Hairdresser's small-talk

So are you at 6th form?

Yes, yeah at RGS

Oh, alright, do you like it there?

Its alright yeah...

*hair dryer starts*

Got much planned for the rest of the day then?

Sorry?

Are you doing anything this afternoon?

Oh, erm, not a lot. A couple of friends are coming round this afternoon.

Ah, nice...

Yeah...

Does anyone else hate going to the hairdresser and having to converse in small talk to people you don't know and quite possibly have nothing in common with.

If I told her what I was going to do this afternoon I would have told her: My friends are coming round this afternoon, we need to transpose some hymns that we're playing at one of my friend's church on Sunday and also to practice them. Then we're going to see Toy Story 3.

I'm sure she would know exactly how to respond to that.

“I think that life would suddenly seem wonderful to us if we were threatened to die as you say. Just think of how many projects, travels, love affairs, studies, it–our life–hides from us, made invisible by our laziness which, certain of a future, delays them incessantly.

But let all this threaten to become impossible for ever, how beautiful it would become again! Ah! If only the cataclysm doesn’t happen this time, we won’t miss visiting the new galleries of the Louvre, throwing ourselves at the feet of Miss X, making a trip to India.

The cataclysm doesn’t happen, we don’t do any of it, because we find ourselves back in the heart of normal life, where negligence deadens desire. And yet we shouldn’t have needed the cataclysm to love life today. It would have been enough to think that we are humans, and that death may come this evening.”
- Marcel Proust

The past days

The last few weeks have been crazy. I went to band camp for a week, came home and went to school for 2 days, then I had a group 4 project for my IB in science where our brief was simply 'design a bag' nothing more, nothing less. So we had a range of groups with bags ranging from a completely biodegradable bag, a santa bag 2000 to a pooper scooper glove. Really coursework can be as exciting as you want it to be. At the end of those 2 days school was over for me. I was no longer in year 12, and now I face 1 final year left at school, and I feel no where near ready to leave yet! Saturday I went to see Inception - oh my god, what a film. It had me gripped from beginning to end, and even though I left the cinema confused and had to get Charlotte to explain it to me with the use of diagrams, which resulted in us both becoming some what more confused about certain elements of the plot, it was still amazingly clever and awesome. Sunday was an early start and a long drive up to the Peak District for my Duke of Edinburgh practice gold expedition. What a week! Seriously, who would have ever thought walking 70km in 4 days could ever be so much fun. Achey feet, wet shoes and heavy backpacks just added to the hilarity of the whole week and at the end of the week on the way home everyone of us agreed that we could have kept going for another few days without having a mental breakdown. Saturday literally consisted of much needed sleep and a disappointing shopping trip in which I bought nothing. I hate shopping trips like that. They are so pointless and every shop you enter and exit bearing nothing just makes you want to shop less and thus the trip becomes increasingly pointless, to the point where even a nice dress seems not wroth buying as there will probably be 'something else nicer somewhere else.' Then Sunday was the Doctor Who proms, it was something I always wanted to go to loving a live orchestra and Doctor Who being my favourite TV show so I had to go. We left the house early. I mean at around 4:30am to queue up for promming tickets. It was so worth it. Not only is London deserted on a Sunday morning and lovely, but we were less than a metre away from Matt Smith's beautiful face. The music was immense and atmosphere was amazing. I am so going again next year :D

Benenden

Literally the most beautiful place and moments in my life so far happen at Benenden. It's such a wonderful place, full of wonderful people and wonderful music.

First rehearsal I entered enthusiastically and I left scared. The music was crazy from a first glance. One was a concerto, so we had loads of rests and random trills is awkward places and ways and on top of all of that it was insanely hot. I came out of that rehearsal wondering what it was actually suppose to sound like. It got hotter throughout the day and throughout the week, whilst the music became more playable, more exciting and nicer to listen to. In our sectional rehearsals we became increasingly bored of playing the same three pieces over and over, (despite the loveliness of them, any amount of crazy repetition eventually does get boring) so we played pieces that our tutors had composed themselves including abstract theatrical pieces where we had to move around the room, 'talk' to each other, improvise and walk out the room. I really enjoyed that.

Benenden school as a place is set in the most beautiful surroundings. Everywhere I went was pleasant despite the dead grass everywhere. Enhanced of course by the sheer amount of music you can hear upon entering the site. My room was so big that one night we all did cartwheels in the middle of the floor space without the fear of hitting our feet on anything and creating a duvet world at 2am in the morning. Every morning we would not get up at the right time, and every time at breakfast we would moan about how tired we were, blame ourselves, and promise ourselves and each other we would go to bed at a reasonable time that night. Of course we broke our promises.

The evenings were the best fun. Saturday evening everyone on the course participated in a massive game of rounders, where my hit was successful and I actually managed to get a rounder - a very proud moment. After that we were brimming with energy and decided to play bulldog, not the safest game and once we finished I am pretty sure almost everyone had a graze and a bruise or two. Human pyramids and piggy back races complete the list as the sun went down and from the first viewing of a star (also argued a bright Venus) in the sky we all decided to lie down and star -gaze. Only getting up when we had to leave to go to bed, and stopping on the way to teach the boys how to do cartwheels.

Everyday I wore sandals, and everyday I came back to the boarding house and my feet were filthy. So of course, we all decided to sit around a bath and clean our feet. This eventually turned into a daily thing before everyone sitting in a circle in our room almost dying from laughter. On Sunday I literally woke up laughing and genuinely had to leave half of my breakfast because I couldn't eat it as I was laughing too hard. It was the best.

The last day was sad, we all sat in our beds in silence not wanting to pack and strip our beds. I think I hugged just about everyone after the concert, some I'll probably never see again, others it was still be half a year before I can talk to them again.

London to Brighton

Yesterday I took part in the British Heart Fountain's annual sponsored bike ride from London to Brighton which is 54 miles in total. I really wasn't as prepared as I could have been, though it didn't really prove a problem and I was one of the leaders of our group for the whole journey. So getting up at 4.30 was the first massive hurdle, and somehow I had forgotten to pack a load of stuff the night before. After actually getting in the car, we had to turn back twice to get things that we had forgotten, so not the best of starts, but at least we got somewhere.

We arrived in the suburbs of London and we could already see many people with bikes and numbers on their t-shirts ready for the race. Finally we were ready to go and suddenly we were cycling. One minute we were in the heart of London and in the next flash we were deep into the countryside with miles of green fields surrounding us, the sun shining and a light summer breeze tickling our arms.

It seems that my lack of training didn't mean a thing. I swear that at every single ascent there were crowds of people making it too busy to actually ride properly. The problem with have narrow country roads and 27,000 riders on them is that they really aren't big enough. If one person gets off, everyone behind them needs to get off and thus a bottle-necked jam forms. At one point we were stopped for around 40 minutes. The story is quite tragic. On the biggest climb which is around 864ft a man collapsed and had to be resuscitated and taken to hospital, and so the hill was blocked off and cyclists were told to stop throughout the whole course to decrease jams. I just feel really sad because when I came home I watched the news and it was said that he had died in hospital from a heart attack. I suppose we don't know his situation, but the fact that it happened on a charity bike ride, namely for the British Heart Foundation makes the whole circumstance a lot more tragic.

Despite the sadness of that one story the rest of the ride was great. There were other obstacles that I rode over, like receiving a puncture, also setting me back around 50 minutes and various other minor crashes happening right by us, but it all plays a part to making the day what it was.

Around 3 times during the day I saw these banners a husband had put up for his wife who was cycling and who he was getting a divorce with. Though evidently from these banners he did not want a divorce and had secretly put them up the night before to grab her attention in the hope of winning her over.

One read: 'Zoe, I accept I've made mistakes. Please, forgive me!'

Another said: 'Zoe, the bond that we both share could be deeper and stronger than ever. Give us that chance and allow our bond of love to blossom again.'

The third sign read: 'Unite us and our family so we may love, laugh and grow together. Why take advantage of us, let's take advantage of life. I love you Zoe! I always have and always will x.'

Another banner right at the end said: 'Come on Chicken - WAH! Flap those wings and shake that tail feather.

'You can do it! I'm roostering for you! Wing!'

Seriously. How embarrassing all around me there were people on their bikes laughing at these banners (they were hilarious) questioning what he had done, making up strange stories about this guy. Apparently, from an article I read about it, when his wife crossed the line she wasn't impressed and said they 'had to talk'. Oh dear.

Another moment I loved was first time riders asking their experienced London to Brighton friends whether 'this was the hill?' at every ascent. To which they almost always replied: 'No, trust me, you will know when THE Hill comes.' And rest assured I did know when it came. Though I cycled up the top half of it, just so I felt a sense of accomplishment when I reached the top and bought an ice cream.

Summer despite the rain

I made cookies for my class on a whim today. It was nice to do something unexpected for everyone whilst they were all feeling a little down and deflated about life in general (which seems to be the over-ruling mood at the moment). I think they were appreciated.

It also seems that the moment I plan to do something at the weekend I receive a ton of work literally a mountain high, none of which take less than an hour to complete, and all of which have some complication that I have to somewhat miraculously overcome.

It seems that my ride from London to Brighton (54 miles) has crept up on me pretty quickly without me detecting it, and yet I come home and sit on the sofa eating a jar of cookies and watching TV not even thinking twice about actually going for a long bike ride as part of training. I just enjoy telling myself: "you'll be fiiiiine, you cycle to school everyday." Though infact I only cycle around 10miles everyday. Add 44 to that and that's 50 miles. Argh! Never mind, I'll do okay. I have stamina. I hope.

You know what. I really want to starting acting again in plays and such, but everything is on at the same time. I swear every single drama group is on at 12 on a Saturday, just in time for me NOT to be able to go. Hey ho such is life. I need more hours in the day.

I seriously think that we wish away our lives. Even now I'm wishing it was Saturday already. Why don't we just live for the moment. It annoys me, and I annoy myself. Summer is SOON!

Knower's Perspective

It's got to that stage when learning a presentation that I hate the sound of my own voice, think what I have written is a complete pile of rubbish that doesn't make sense and my mouth is all dry. Ah, how I love you theory of knowledge, you confusing monstrosity.